american honey


I had a quote page on lady_leia_solo, but it didn't make the jump to entrospect (and it's not on my Dreamwidth either). I'm going to rectify that by moving it over. So this will be the new quote page.

1. Nobody has ever measured, not even the poets, how much the heart can hold -Zelda Fitzgerald
2. She is a great gobbler of books, but reads only trash, memorizing nothing and leaving out the longer descriptions -Vladimir Nabokov in Despair.
3. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. -Albert Einstein
4. Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune -Jim Rohn
5. Have faith that God loves you in a way which you cannot dream, loves you even with your sin and in your sin- Fyodor Dostoyevsky in the Book II: Women of Faith of The Brothers Karamazov
6. You'll never get to heaven if you're scared of getting high- Kylie Minogue, Red Blooded Woman
7. She writes like she's starving and reads like she's feasting -R.D. Larson
8. Life is a long ache which rarely sleeps and can never be cured.- George Sand
9. I have the choice of being constantly active and happy or introspectively passive and sad. Or I can go mad by ricocheting in between.- Sylvia Plath
10. Yes, I was infatuated with you: I am still. No one has ever heightened such a keen capacity of physical sensation in me. I cut you out because I couldn't stand being a passing fancy. Before I give my body, I must give my thoughts, my mind, my dreams. And you weren't having any of those.- Sylvia Plath
11. I love people. Everybody. I love them, I think, as a stamp collector loves his collection. Every story, every incident, every bit of conversation is raw material for me. My love's not impersonal yet not wholly subjective either. I would like to be everyone, a cripple, a dying man, a whore, and then come back to write about my thoughts, my emotions, as that person. But I am not omniscient. I have to live my life, and it is the only one I'll ever have. And you cannot regard your own life with objective curiosity all the time...-Sylvia Plath
12. Perhaps some day I'll crawl back home, beaten, defeated. But not as long as I can make stories out of my heartbreak, beauty out of sorrow.- Sylvia Plath
13. Living with him is like being told a perpetual story: his mind is the biggest, most imaginative I have ever met. I could live in its growing countries forever.- Sylvia Plath
14. I have known the joy and pain of friendship. I have served and been served. I have made some good enemies for which I am not a bit sorry. I have loved unselfishly, and I have fondled hatred with the red-hot tongs of Hell. That's living.- Zora Neale Hurston
15. Love is like the sea. It's a moving thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from the shore it meets, and it's different with every shore.- Zora Neale Hurston
16. If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it. - Zora Neale Hurston
17. I think that little by little I'll be able to solve my problems and survive.- Frida Kahlo
18. Nothing is absolute. Everything changes, everything moves, everything revolves, everything flies and goes away.- Frida Kahlo
19. And so our mothers and grandmothers have, more often than not anonymously, handed on the creative spark, the seed of the flower they themselves never hoped to see -- or like a sealed letter they could not plainly read.-Alice Walker
20. The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.- Alice Walker
21. It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences. -Audre Lorde
22. Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure. -Oprah Winfrey
23. When I dare to be powerful - to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid. -Audre Lorde
24. Grab the broom of anger and drive off the beast of fear. -Zora Neale Hurston
25. Your silence will not protect you. -Audre Lorde
26. Don't be afraid to feel as angry or as loving as you can, because when you feel nothing, it's just death. -Lena Horne
27. I will not have my life narrowed down. I will not bow down to somebody else's whim or to someone else's ignorance. -bell hooks
28. You have a right to your thoughts and feelings. Your feelings are always valid. -Iyanla Vanzant
29. We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated. -Maya Angelou
30. Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated. -Coretta Scott King
31. I really don't think life is about the I-could-have-beens. Life is only about the I-tried-to-do. I don't mind the failure but I can't imagine that I'd forgive myself if I didn't try. -Nikki Giovanni
32. Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night. -Marian Wright Edelman
33. Do you want to know who you are? Don't ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you.-Thomas Jefferson
34. All great achievements require time.-Maya Angelou
35. You can't build a reputation on what you are going to do.-Henry Ford
36. It is never too late to be what you might have been-George Eliot
37. I like not only to be loved. I like to be told that I am loved-George Eliot
38. You cannot find peace by avoiding life-Virginia Woolf
39. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
40. You must be the change you want to see in the world.-Mahatma Gandhi
41. People who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.-Apple Inc.
42. Don’t let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.- Richard L. Evans
43. The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.-Chinese Proverb
44. I want to say somewhere: I've tried to be forgiving. And yet. There were times in my life, whole years, when anger got the better of me. Ugliness turned me inside out. There was a certain satisfaction in bitterness. I courted it. It was standing outside, and I invited it in.-Nicole Krauss
45. Can you understand? Someone, somewhere, can you understand me a little, love me a little? For all my despair, for all my ideals, for all that - I love life. But it is hard, and I have so much - so very much to learn.-Sylvia Plath
46. I am still so naïve; I know pretty much what I like and dislike; but please, don’t ask me who I am. A passionate, fragmentary girl, maybe?-Sylvia Plath
47. I wonder why I don't go to bed and go to sleep. But then it would be tomorrow, so I decide that no matter how tired, no matter how incoherent I am, I can skip on hour more of sleep and live.-Sylvia Plath
48. Art is magic delivered from the lie of being truth.-Theodor Adorno
49. A writer — and, I believe, generally all persons — must think that whatever happens to him or her is a resource. All things have been given to us for a purpose, and an artist must feel this more intensely. All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our embarrassments, all is given to us as raw material, as clay, so that we may shape our art.- Jorge Luis Borges
50. Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.-Cyril Connolly
51. Birth is the start of loneliness and loneliness the start of poetry...-Erica Jong
52. Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.-Anais Nin
53. Anxiety is love's greatest killer. It makes one feel as you might when a drowning man holds unto you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic.-Anais Nin
54. Art is the symbol of the two noblest human efforts: to construct and to refrain from destruction. - Simone Weil

(no subject)

I have Parkinsonism.

Not Parkinson's Disease.

But Parkinsonism.

I'm still trying to figure out what exactly the difference is, but que sera sera.

I've been treated tardive dyskinesia since like lmao forever ago but in reality like nine to ten years. My doctor at Shreveport Mental Health started to point out to me that I would lick my lips. I didn't really know what the fuck he was talking about and I just kinda ignored it.

As I've changed mental health places twice since then the doctors...the nurses...are still noticing the symptoms.

Tardive dyskinesia in my case at least presented itself after I was given an antipsychotic for my mental health issues. Do I know which antipsychotic it was? Nope. I've been one so many different ones, but I know that it's usually caused by first-generation atypicals.

I started to have tremors in my arm. I told my doctor about it. He told me it was tardive dystonia. He suggested another pill for it: cogentin. I didn't want to be yet another medication, but I somehow didn't mind taking yet another vitamin. So I started to take Vitamin E.

Fast forward to 2019. I'm moving slow as fuck. Having trouble getting out bed. My mom would mention it and I would be like: tis fine! Tis just a scratch!

But the nurse practitioner...She noticed a problem. One I had denied. One I didn't believe in. She immediately took me off of Ingrezza (a pill specifically for tardive dyskinesia) and put me on amantadine.

Great! I thought! Well, those issues are over amirite?


They didn't get worse. The tremors in my arm were about the same and I can't see what's going on on my face so I wasn't too bothered. mind said...I'm on too many medications and I don't like it!

So I asked them if I could go off the amantadine.

THEM: (long pause) You still need to be on that for now.
ME: (confused but nonargumentative) Okay!

I was still on that red pill in the hospital. I didn't question it. Honestly, I didn't give a fuck. I just wanted to sleep.

But as I looked at my discharge papers I saw: Parkinsonism.

And it struck fear in my heart.
britney only girl

[Public] Discussion Post

Would you guys call Jane Eyre an antiheroine?

I'm reading this list of 10 ten antiheroines. I see Jane Eyre and I read the reasoning. While I agree she may have been an antiheroine in the age she was written. I don't think she'd be one now. Does she belong on the list? By today's standards Jane would definitely be a heroine.